Nobody will read this post (View Comments)
4/29/11 •
Today is April 29, 2011. An otherwise uneventful day. Except for one thing. Kate Middleton is going to tie the knot with Prince “the future King” William. Over a billion people are expected to watch the nuptials. My bet is that nobody will read this post. Sweet! That means I am free to write about [...]
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Making peace with the BS (View Comments)
4/28/11 •
Since I began eating solid food, Brussels sprouts have been my nemesis. My mother would boil those green balls beyond recognition. When I just couldn’t stomach them any longer, I tried shipping them off to Africa. My mom wasn’t forcing Brussels sprouts on me just to be cruel. What I should say is that I [...]
10 Celebrity Don’ts (View Comments)
4/28/11 •
1. Don’t wear panties. Panties with a skirt only lead to VPL, a condition that should be avoided at all costs! Some may claim that the thong can prevent visible panty lines, but why bother? Commando is the way to go! 2. Don’t enter or exit a car in a ladylike fashion. The only [...]
10 royal wedding gifts for Kate Middleton (View Comments)
4/28/11 •
It’s dawn on the eve of Kate Middleton and Prince William’s wedding. Luckily, I am not invited, because if I were, I would be at a loss to think of the appropriate wedding gift. Kate Middleton isn’t your average bride, so an average gift is out of the question. What exactly does one give the [...]
Portfolio: Wishes in Limbo (View Comments)
4/27/11 •
Do you ever wonder where your wishes go to? I imagine that my wishes float off through the air. Somewhere between here and Heaven, the wishes get caught in a net. Angels’ helpers try to match up the wish with the wisher, but what happens when they aren’t successful? Maybe there is a lost and [...]
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